It be’s that way sometimes.

Update on the furniture saga ‘08: Mr. Liar Pants is now just Mr. L. Pants. He has upgraded his status slightly by responding post haste to an e-mail query I sent regarding if they were or were not coming today. I appreciate promptness.

Update on house revival saga ‘08: Tile was put into our kitchen yesterday–which means our fridge was put into our living room along with a table, six chairs, and a baker’s rack–but the tile looks GREAT, and we don’t have to walk as far to get a cold drink. Today they will calk, and tomorrow, the kids can run amok on the tile and giggle and slide. We didn’t think they were going to have to rip up the vinyl because it was down pretty good, but when they removed the quarter round from the based boards, the tile ripped, so they scraped it all up. Victoria is normally the sensitive one around here when it comes to change, but it was Thad who crawled into my lap and cried over the destruction of the only kitchen floor he’s ever known. It was a little overwhelming to find out that the “ground” beneath his feet could be so quickly yanked from under him. I hope this is the only time in his life that happens–but I doubt it will be.

Pillows and window scarf and mantle scape photos coming at some point. We’re movin’ on.

As I was just standing in the livingroom ironing one of eight curtains that is now freshly laundered and is about to be hung on a freshly painted wall, Victoria was inquiring about the workings of the iron. She commented that NaNa had “BIG metal ones and when she was a little girl it was her job to get up each morning and put the irons in the fire.”

Well, never one to pass up an etymological teaching moment, I began to explain the real and figurative meaning of the phrase “too many irons in the fire.” Literally if someone had too many irons in the fire, the irons could overheat before they were ready for use and burn the fabric to which they were applied OR you would have to take them OUT of the fire and wait for them to cool–thereby wasting time and/or money. Figuratively, of course, that phrase means someone is doing too many things at once thereby risking the waste of. . .time and/or money.

And my smart girl said, “So, Mommy, I would say that right now you have too many irons in the fire.” And she is so right.

Life is fraught with irony.

Update: Mr. Liar Pants and Co. are VERY, VERY fortunate to have Amanda in Customer Service. She is a Miss Nice Pants–a Miss Helpful Pants–a Miss Voice of Reason Pants. She is the only thing keeping me from slamming Mr. Liar Pants into a wall. Of course, there is always the possibility that she is a Miss Liar Pants, but for now, I will trust that she is truthful and helpful. I told her that she deserved a raise. She thanked me and told me in turn that I was one of her nicer disgruntled customers–probably because I didn’t yell or curse or try to blame anything on her. If, of course, she turns out to be Mr. Liar Pants kin, then I will fill out the lovely purchase dispute form that my credit card sent me earlier today. We’ll see on Friday when the “new” furniture is delivered.

1. Shop around. I have done this on things from fabric to bedspreads to furniture. It’s definitely worth it–especially with the lovely computer age in which we live–makes shopping around much easier. We live in a big ‘ole town with lots of avaialable stores, but many places will deliver things for free to get the sale–just make sure that the merchandise you are getting is the SAME BRAND NAME as what you have seen.

2. Find somewhere to SEE the items first if you can. Seeing is believing. And I mean seeing the ACTUAL item.

3. Do NOT buy furniture from Mr. Liar Pants. Mr. Liar Pants is anyone who promises you a “good deal” and that his furniture is “like everyone else’s” and has a “marginal supply of it to show you because they only keep certain items in stock so they can keep their overhead low and pass the savings on to you.” He is a Mr. Liar Pants. And possibly a Mr. Liar Shirt and Shoes as well. He is STILL a Mr. Liar Pants even when you ask him to clarify REPEATEDLY. Even when you ask him the same question more than four times and he ASSURES you that the information he is giving you is correct. Even when, before he puts the order in the computer, you restate EVERYTHING HE HAS TOLD YOU TO BE TRUE and he says, “That is correct,” he is STILL a Mr. Liar Pants.

4. It’s worth the extra bucks to go to a REAL furniture store and pay $200 more to SEE the items and have a “no hassle money back guarantee.” We have bought from both, and it is WORTH IT. I am about to have to negotiate with Mr. Liar Pants while Mr. Honest Pants is about to get some more of our business after the mess with Mr. Liar Pants is cleared up.

5. I’ll keep you informed.

(And I will NOT be offended if you don’t read this. . .it’s more for me to remember this time so that I NEVER MOVE AGAIN. . .except possibly into an apartment if the house sells early–fingers crossed. . .then into a new house. . .but not again after that.)

10:00 AM Thursday- Real Estate agent came to look at our current home–loved the spacious back yard, covered porch, and master suite–gave us good news that we could get what we wanted for it relatively easily–boggled at the amount of stuff we had squeezed in here (and doesn’t know that we have already put several things in storage–basically told us to keep on working

10:30 AM- Reputable furniture store arrives with Victoria’s new dresser and nightstand WHILE real estate gal is here

11:15 AM- Real estate gal left

11:16 AM- Cried–a little overwhelmed

12:55 PM- All headed out to the property to place stakes where we want the front of the house

1:40 PM- and found that not only were our culverts delivered but placed in the ground with a very nice construction road atop it

Next two hours–gazed at lovely road, scenery, visited with neighbors, measured and staked things off, dreamed about actually living there

4:00 PM- left property to come home

4:45-7:00 PM- swung by library to return/recheck books, came home, got gift certificates for restaurant, went to eat

7:00-8:05 PM- Home Depot to check out carpet/tile/laminate prices and paint for current home–great prices–lousy customer service

8:10-9:30 PM- Lowes for the same thing–marginally higher prices–excellent customer service

9:45-10:00 PM- Ate Flav-O-Ice

10:00-11:30 PM- Crunched numbers for both stores and decided on carpet and tile and paint for current home (you guessed it: beige, beige, and beige)

11:30 PM-12:00 AM- Watched M*A*S*H on DVD

12:15 AM-6:45 AM Friday- Collapsed

8:30-9:15 AM- To Lowes to schedule measurements for carpet, etc.

9:45 AM- Arrive at Tony’s parents’ house to drop off kids so we could attend

10:00 AM- Meeting with finacial advisor

11:05 AM-1:00 PM- Went to pick up furniture ordered from a store run by Mr. Liar Pants

1:00 PM-1:50 PM- Visited with Tony’s parents

2:00-2:30 PM- Dr. appt.

3:30 PM- Begin moving and unwrapping new furniture–one piece damaged–wrong hutch sent.

3:30-6:00 PM- Call Mr. Liar Pants to discuss wrong furniture, unwrap more furniture–sweat–sweat–sweat–PROMISE each other to hire movers

6:30-9:30 PM- get Victoria’s furniture set up/pack up room/move boxes (with a 30 minute snow cone break)

9:30 PM- collapse in front of computer–Tony is already showered–I am so jealous but don’t know if I possess the ability to actually go up the stairs

Tomorrow MORE packing and moving and furniture but we get to STAY HOME. For all of the insanity–things are coming together.

Thad does not like:

putting his shirt on before his pants
hair in his eyes
carbonated beverages
mashed potatoes
iced tea
peanut butter WITHOUT jelly

AND, in keeping with that theme, yesterday when I made Tony’s traditional strawberry cake and inquired as to whether or not Thad would like a piece he said,

“I do NOT wike stuh-waw-bewwy. I don’t even wike duh WUHD stuh-waw-bewwy.”

Now you know. And so do I.

I have STILL not taken my Motrin. Please remind me to do that too.

BUT we ahve a HUGE stack of boxes at the door and three hotspot junk piles all sorted/boxed/thrown away/in a box for Goodwill. WAHOO.

Motrin. Motrin. Motrin.

Update. . .30 minutes later. . .three more boxes packed. . .one doll house broken down. . .still no Motrin.

Please also remind me that my lower back is just not what it used to be AND that packing to move aggrivates my lower back to the extent that it lets me know in NO uncertain terms about its unhappiness with me.

Time for some Motrin.

a) I am too old to go shopping at 10 pm even in the summer when I don’t have to get up and go to work the next day. At the beginning of my shopping excursion tonight–which I put off until that late because I did NOT want to go in the afternoon when it was SO STINKIN’ BLAZIN’ HOT AND we had VBS tonight–I stood in the shampoo aisle and nearly cried. Seriously.

b) It is SO STINKIN’ BLAZIN’ HOT that I even sweat at 10 pm–except rather than sweating in the glaring light of day, I just sweat in the dark. It is oppressive right now. . .and it’s getting worse I believe.

Thus endeth the list. We are packing and cleaning and cleaning and packing and sorting and boxing up around here. A real estate agent is coming at 10:00 on Thursday to tell us what we already know–that we need new flooring and to paint the entire interior and get the GARGANTUAN snake off the back porch. Hopefully she will to tell us if we need to paint over the wallpaper in the kitchen, put in laminate flooring or tile downstairs rather than carpet, and if the chickens can stay as (to me) they are not nearly as offensive as the snake. The market is slow right now–even though it’s summer–but we have a ROCKIN’ back yard, so maybe that will sell this place for us.

Last week we went furniture shopping (more)–LOTS of furniture sales–and the reason we went ahead and got it is because they will HOLD IT FOR US until we move in. Hallelujah.

Tony turns 40 in 17 minutes. Strawberry cake tomorrow.

Melanie over at This Ain’t New York just did this and said I’d re-post and so I shall. . .just in case you missed it the first time. I made a few changes for the current situation.

1. Where is your cell phone? purse
2. Your significant other? honorable
3. Your hair? wild
4. Your mother? strong
5. Your father? home
6. Your favorite thing? family
7. Your dream last night? school
8. Your favorite drink? cola
9. Your goal or dream? gentleness
10. The room you’re in? dining
11. Your kids? precious
12. Your fear? loss
13. Where do you want to be in 6 years? Waller
14. Where were you last night? couch
15. What you’re not? quiet
16. Muffins? fiber
17. One of your wish list items? desk
18. Where you grew up? Louisiana
19. The last thing you did ? eat
20. What are you wearing? night gown
21. Your TV? old
22. Your pets? none
23. Your computer? addictive
24. Your life? blessed
25. Your mood? ovewhelmed
26. Missing someone? Sarah
27. Your car? Honda
28. Something you’re not wearing? shoes
29. Favorite Store? Target
30. Your summer? fun
31. Like someone? everyone
32. Your favorite color? pink
33. When is the last time you laughed? reading
34. Last time you cried? today
35. The person who sent this to you? important
36. Who will/would resend this? unknown
37. A good book? touching
38. A good movie? romantic
39. A good song? overwhelming
40. One word to share? joy